Save the World, Please
by Foxtail-inferno
Summary: Naruto, Tales of Symphonia, Harry Potter, Bleach, Star Wars, Bobobo, Fullmetal Alchemist and more! One character from each of the aforementioned anime has gone through a shiny, yellow portal and landed in some new world and now they have to save it!HIATUS
1. We got abducted!

Full Summary: What happens when you get Hatake Kakashi from Naruto, Raine Sage from Tales of Symphonia, Draco Malfoy from Harry Potter, Kuchiki Rukia from Bleach, Darth Vader from Star Wars, Bo-bobo from Bo-bobo Bobobo-bo and Winry Rockbell from Fullmetal Alchemist and send them on a quest to save the world? Crack, Crack Pairings, OOCness, wrench-throwing, Singing being triggered… Kakashi x Raine. WTF is CK smoking? O--o

Don't worry. She's not really smoking anything.

She was born this way.

Deal with it.

Disclaimer: I don't own Naruto, Tales of Symphonia, Harry Potter, Bleach, the Bleach detergent, Star Wars, Bo-bobo Bobobo-bo, Fullmetal Alchemist, any songs being sung, the idea for songs being triggered via someone saying something nor the word 'Strengthness.'

ON WITH THE STORY!

**Chapter one: We got abducted!**

It was a normal day as any for Kakashi.

If you count Sasuke whining about how his poptarts didn't toast right, Sakura kicking the shit out of a tree and Naruto wiggling around like some weird jelly-man, then it was perfectly normal. So normal, it was scary.

Kakashi closed the oh-so-famous Icha-Icha Paradise and told team seven to go home for the day.

"BUT, I HAVEN'T TOLD YOU MY WHOLE LIFE'S STORY, YET!" Sasuke shouted.

"You told me your life's story three weeks ago," Kakashi sighed, "For the fiftieth time. Next is the part where you go EMO."

"I'M NOT EMO!"

"You ARE Emo," Kakashi said.

"Well… well… YOUR FACE!" Sasuke shouted and then ran off, succeeding in tripping five times along the way.

"Sakura, stop gnawing on that tree – I told you to go home. Naruto – are you listening to _Shakira_?"

"NO!"

"_Hips don't lie…" _said the radio.

Kakashi just kinda stared.

And then he 1000-years-of-pain'd the radio and Naruto.

Kakashi was now alone. He opened his book and, where the next page of the book should've been, there was a shiny circle.

That grew.

And, like, engulfed Kakashi in yellow light, yo.

Ya dig?

All of a sudden, Kakashi was falling from the sky. He looked down to see the ground. Now, when the ground rushed up to meet him, it didn't hug him or shake his hand – it hit him in the face!

How DARE someone attack Kakashi!

And with DIRT nonetheless!

Oh, well.

His problem, not mine.

Meanwhile, somewhere else, over the rainbow, but not really because then that would mean that they were in the next country over, which they weren't, because they were actually in a parallel universe, there were some people that were vital to this plot.

Kinda like Sylvarant and Tethe'alla.

Which is where we're going now.

So, hop on the bus and let's get a move-on!

SHUT UP, BACK THERE!

STOP THROWING PAPER AIRPLANES OR I'LL MAKE _YOU_ INTO A PAPER AIRPLANE AND THROW _YOU_!

And now we zoom off!

Raine Sage was showing the class how to put a y-intercept equation into Ax plus By equals C form.

It wasn't going very well.

"Duh," Colette Brunel said dumbly, raising her hand, "Where'd the four come from again?"

"That is the _slope_," Raine said, "We go _four up_ and _one over_ because it is a _positive slope_."

"Why not go two up and six over?" Colette asked, "I like two and six."

"Because _two sixths _is NOT the _slope_!" Raine said, exasperated.

How Colette had managed to get into her Algebra class was beyond Raine.

Oh, that's right.

Raine is the only teacher in the WHOLE. STINKING. VILLAGE.

"So, what's the seven?"

"That's the _y-intercept_!" Raine said.

"I thought Y was the y-intercept!"

"GAH!" Raine shouted, "CLASS DISMISSED! COLETTE, YOU FAIL! YOU FAIL AT ALL OF MY CLASSES AND LIFE! YOU FAIL SO BAD YOU FAIL AT DYING! GO DIE A SLOW AND PAINFUL DEATH ANYWAY, JUMP OFF A CLIFF OR SOMETHING – PREFERABLY RESULTING IN YOU DYING WITHOUT FAIL, YOU FAILING FAILURE!"

"But, I'm the chosen of—"

"NOBODY GIVES A SHIT! God, I-I mean, Martel!" Raine said.

The class ran out as if they were being chased by a rabid dog.

Except Colette.

She just stood there like the idiot she is.

"Duhhh… Is class over?" Colette said.

"COLETTE. GET YOUR SORRY ASS OVER HERE OR YOU'RE GONNA DIE!" Genis shouted

"Why not just let her die?" Lloyd asked.

"Good point. RUN, LLOYD! RUN BEFORE SHE BEGS US TO SAVE HER!" and the two ran.

Colette just frolicked out of the room. Raine sat down at the desk and rubbed her temples.

"Good God… I mean Martel…" she said. She turned to stand up, even though she only just sat down, and looked at the board.

It was shiny.

And yellow.

It made Raine disappear.

It made Raine fall from the sky.

It made Raine fall to the ground.

It hurt.

The ground doesn't make for a good welcome committee, does it?

Oh, well!

Let's go visit Malfoy!

Malfoy was pacing in his room.

What should he sing?

He'd sung every song he knew!

Well, not including SOME songs…

But, he didn't really want to sully his voice by singing those songs.

"DRACO! OPEN YOUR DOOR, RIGHT NOW, OR YOUR FRIENDS ARE NOT COMING OVER!" His mom shouted

"WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS? WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS?" Draco sang.

"OPEN. THE. DOOR."

"STOP. ABUSING. CAPSLOCK."

"IT'S THE AUTHOR'S FAULT. NOW, OPEN THE DOOR!"

"NO."

"YES."

"NO."

"YES."

"YES."

"NO."

"HAH! REVERSE PSYCHOLOGY!" Malfoy shouted.

He sat down smugly.

He then decided to read a book.

Just some random book.

Yep.

It just so happened to be that this random book was randomly beside his random bed on some random desk that wasn't even there to begin with. This random book also randomly had that random, yellow, glowing circle that randomly grew to randomly suck in random people and randomly transport them to some random world to randomly fall from some random sky and randomly meet some random bit of random ground.

Randomly.

As for our next person, it was originally in the script for Rukia to appear, but they're having some technical difficulties.

None of which Rukia knows about.

She'll figure it out somehow.

Let's see how Darth Vader is doing.

"Yes, that's evil, yes… hehhh heh! No, that doesn't work… How about hehehe! No… Heh heh! ARG!" Vader said, "IT SAID ON THE INTERNET THAT STUPID EVIL LAUGH WAS EASY TO MASTER!"

"Uh, Lord Va—"

"SHUT UP, MINION!" Vader said, "Hmm… since that laughing idea went out the window, let's spin around!" he spun the chair around, "WHEEEEEEEEEE!!" And it started to spin faster, which it wasn't programmed to do, seeing as it could cause a yellow circle that grew to engulf whoever was spinning in the chair and transport them to a parallel world to meet the evil ground.

Hmm, this sounds a bit too much like Malfoy's transportation, doesn't it?

Oh, well! You can ignore that fact.

Because it seems that the soul society is back with breaking news!

THEY HAVE YOUR PANTS.

…

Uh…

(You, as a reader, hear scribbling)

There we go.

THEY HAVE YOUR DVD BOXED SET OF -insert anime title here-!

…

WHO WROTE THAT?!

WHATEVER! LET'S GET ON WITH THE STORY!

Rukia was patiently waiting for Kon to stop being an idiot and get into the stupid backpack.

"GET INTO THE STUPID BACKPACK, KON!!" Rukia shouted, "HURRY UP! I DON'T HAVE ALL DAY!"

Okay, nearly patiently.

"BUT, RUUUUKIAAAAA! I SENSE A GREAT DISTURBANCE IN THE FOOOOORCE!"

"YOU IDIOT! THEY ALREADY SHOWED STAR WARS! THAT'S JUST GAS!"

"NORMAL STUFFED ANIMALS DON'T HAVE GAS!"

"YOU'RE NOT A NORMAL STUFFED ANIMAL!"

And with a final shove, Rukia succeeded in forcing Kon into the backpack and zipping it, then taping it with duct tape.

Rukia sighed in annoyance and went back to Ichigo's house.

She put Kon in the closet.

She closed the closet door.

She turned around and saw…

THE OTHER SIDE OF THE ROOM!

And you thought it was gonna be that shiny circle thing, din'cha?

Naw, that comes later!

Like… in a few seconds!

Because, in approximately a few seconds, the shiny circle thing appeared on the other side of the room!

And Rukia was like, 'Imma ditch this joint' and ran into the shiny circle.

And the circle was like, 'OMFG!ENGULF!'

And Rukia was like, 'LOL!IGETSENTTOANOTHERWORLDWITHOUTTHESPACEBAR!'

She, unlike the many three before her, was great friends with the ground.

So, she landed gracefully.

But, that's irrelevant to the situation.

Bo-bobo bobobo-bo, meanwhile, was sitting.

Doing Yoga.

A demon cow came out and ran in circles.

The mighty hero, Bo-bobo, did nothing.

The demon cow, whom I will call Pedro because like hell I'm gonna type out "the demon cow," continued to run in circles.

The mighty hero, Bo-bobo, did nothing.

Still.

WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN, A GUITAR CAME OUTTA NOWHERES AND LANDED IN BO-BOBO'S 'FRO!

The mighty hero, Bo-bobo, did…

Nothing.

AGAIN.

But, then he did something.

He yawned.

And then, he went back to doing nothing.

And then, he raised his hands up to the sky.

And then, he said something incomprehensible.

And then, he noticed the author was using 'and then' too much.

Next, he shouted, "I AM A BUTTERFLY! PLEASE ACCEPT GUITAR AS A SACRIFICE!"

And then, he pulled the guitar out of his 'fro and whacked Pedro (the demon cow, remember?) over the head.

Poor Pedro then pointed a finger at Bo-bobo, "YOU DARE HIT ME WITH THAT? THEN I SHALL HIT YOU WITH THIS!"

He began to spin in circles, much like Neji's "heavenly spin".

Only not.

But, anyway, he stopped spinning and said, "TAKE THIS! THE 'BEETCH, YOU'S GONNA BE DED!' VACUUM!"

Bo-bobo stared.

"You still do not know the name of this guitar, do you, Pedro?" Bo-bobo said, "It's the 'BEETCH, YOU'S GONNA BE DEDDER THAN DED!' guitar!"

Pedro's eyes widened.

Pedro clapped his hands – er… hooves? – together and waved them around before slapping them on the ground.

Then, a shiny circle opened and— you know the drill…

Let's go through the gate to Amestris, now.

One at a time, please.

Payment is to be made to The Truth over there.

He prefers arms and legs.

But, you can give him your head if you want.

Anyway, Winry Rockbell was fixing some guy's atumail when she noticed a typo in the script.

"OMG!" She omg'd, "THERE'S A TYPO IN THE SCRIPT!"

She scribbled out 'atumail' and wrote 'automail that owns your ass' in its place.

She smiled, satisified.

She told the guy to leave and he disappeared.

Literally.

PLOT HOLE!

Naw, not really.

He just evaporated.

Anyway, just like before, a shiny circle appeared and engulfed Winry, thus making her fall from the sky like all of the other people before her.

Though, she didn't land on the ground.

She landed on people.

Which broke her fall.

Just because she felt like it, she chucked a wrench at someone.

Which, instead of knocking them out, it woke them up.

It happened to be Kakashi.

And since everything always goes so well, everyone immediately woke up.

Except Rukia.

She was already awake.

Because I said so.

"What happened last night…?" Kakashi asked no-one in particular.

"Your MOM happened last night," Malfoy muttered.

"My mom is dead,"

"Your mom is old,"

"So she is…" Kakashi said.

They both shrugged.

"I have the feeling that, in a moment, we're going to know exactly what's going on because the author is lazy," Raine asked.

"How do you know that?" Vader asked.

"Woman's intu—" Raine started, "No, wait. I'm psychic."

"OMG!" Vader omg'd, doing his LOLVictoryPose, "I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT'S GOING ON! WE HAVE TO SAVE THE CHICKENS!"

And everyone was like, -staaaaare-

And Vader was still like, -LOLVictoryPose-

"Idiot, we have to save the world," Rukia said.

"From what, though?" Winry asked.

"The Hair Hunt Troops!" Bo-bobo said, saying something for the first time since everyone woke up.

"No, the Akatsuki," Kakashi said

"Homunculi!" Winry shouted

"Hollows!" Rukia argued.

"Me?" Vader suggested.

"Voldemort," Malfoy said.

"Cruxis!" Raine yelled.

"What if they're all working together?" Winry asked

"Idiot, then Vader wouldn't be here!" Raine said.

"Good point…"

"I KNOW!" Vader shouted, "We have to save the world from… from… uh… That one guy!"

"Oh, that's specific," Malfoy said sarcastically

"Shut up, you!"

"Make me!"

"I will!"

"YOU ONLY HAVE WEAKNESSES!" Malfoy shouted, "YOU HAVE NO STRENGTHNESSES!"

"YOU GOT THAT FROM ANOTHER FANFIC!" Vader shouted back.

Malfoy gasped.

"GASP!" Malfoy said.

"GASP!" went everyone else except Vader.

"GASP!" Went the author.

"GASP!" Went all of the people reading this fic.

"GASP!" went the whole world.

"GA—!"

"ENOUGH ALREADY!" Malfoy shouted.

Silence…

Malfoy sighed.

"It is true I got it from a fanfic, but it is also in the disclaimer!" He said.

Vader looked taken aback.

Well, we couldn't really tell because of the mask…

But, by the way he was standing, we kind of guessed.

So, Vader hopped out of the story, scrolled up to read the disclaimer and, sure enough, there it was…

"_… nor the word 'strengthness.'_" It said.

Vader scrolled back down and hopped back into the story.

"I apologize," He apologized apologetically.

Malfoy nodded, showing he accepted the apology that Vader had said in an apologetic kind of way.

"CUT IT WITH THE 'APOLOGIZING' SHIT!" the reader, in this case you, shouted.

"So, who were you talking about, Vader?" Kakashi asked

"I TOLD YOU! THAT ONE GUY!"

"WHICH GUY?! THERE ARE A BILLION OF 'EM!" Rukia said, "YOU COULD MEAN MICHAEL JACKSON FOR ALL WE KNOW!"

"No, that's not him," Vader said dismissively, "It's, like... an eyeball,"

"Sauron…?" Winry tried.

"Yeah,"

"He was defeated last week," Bo-bobo said.

"Oh…"

"It's WUYA, isn't it?!" Kakashi shouted

"OMG!" Everyone omg'd, "NO WAY!"

"Yeah, I didn't think so, either…" Kakashi said.

"IT'S THE MARY-SUE AND GARY-STU CLANS!" Ruka shouted.

And thus their journey began.

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_

_**BECAUSE I SAID SO…**_

_**THIS FONT IS ANNOYING…**_

_**BUT IT'S FUN TO WRITE IN…**_

_**OMFG…**_

_**LOOK, IT'S JACK SPARROW…**_

_**WHY IS HE DOING LAUNDRY…?**_

And now, it's time for AUTHOR'S COMMENTS...

Do you guys like this? Is it shit? do you have Ideas? would you like to share them? I'll mention you before the chapters

DO YOU HAVE QUESTIONS FOR THE CHARACTERS?!


	2. Shun the non believer!

Chapter two already?!

OMG'Z

Disclaimer: I don't own anything mentioned in the previous disclaimer, nor do I own Charlie the Unicorn, Tsubasa Chronicles, xxxHolic or Captain Planet.

I DO Own "Holy shizznitpickleonastick," though.

**Chapter two: Shun the non-believer!**

So far, the destruction of the Gary-Stu clan had been going successful. However, our group had not come along any Mary-Sues until now, so they had no idea how to fight them.

This Mary-Sue had long, blonde hair, one green and one blue eye and very skimpy clothing.

This Mary-Sue annoyed Raine to no end.

This Mary-Sue was apparently paired with Malfoy because she suddenly strode over to him, squeezed him and was like, "Omg darling i missd u"

And Malfoy was like, "Omg i missed u to"

And Raine was like, "OMG BAD GRAMMAR!"

Rukia and Vader exchanged glances.

Vader nodded.

Vader walked over to Malfoy and knelt on his hands and knees.

"CAN YOU NOT FEEL THE EVIL THAT BURNS WITH THE WHITE HOT INTENSITY OF A THOUSAND PLUS SUNS?! IT RADIATES FROM THIS MARY-SUE'S VERY SKIN!"

"SHUN THE NON-BELIEVER!" Malfoy shouted, "SHUNNNNN!"

"WHAT?!" Vader said.

"SHUNNNN!" Malfoy repeated

"YOU'RE GETTING WITH THE MARY-SUE! THE VERY THING YOU VOWED TO DESTROY!" Vader said

"AND YOU BECAME A SITH LORD! THE VERY THING _YOU_ VOWED TO DESTROY! SHUNNNN!"

"You're both abusing the shift key!" Raine said

"But…" Malfoy said, "The author uses caps lock, not shift key."

"THEY BOTH DO THE SAME THING!" Vader said

"WHAT?! IMPOSSIBLE!" Malfoy said.

"WHO'S THE NON-BELIEVER, NOW?!" Vader said

"SHUNNNN!" Said everyone

"I SHUN YOU MORE!" Malfoy shouted back.

"I SHUN YOU MORE THAN MORE!" Vader said, holding up a hand, "Talk to the hand 'cause the face ain't home! Leave a message after the tone! BEEP!"

"YOUR FACE IS UGLY," Malfoy spat.

"WELL YOURS IS… IS…" Vader said, "Is… PALE!"

"Mine's pale, too…" muttered the author.

"DON'T INTERFERE!" Vader and Malfoy shouted.

"Psh…" The author said. She held a hand up to the screen, "YOU FOOLS! I CAN MAKE YOU DO WHATEVER I WANT YOU TO DO!"

"O RLY?"

"YA RLY!"

"SRSLY?"

"SRSLY!"

"LIKE, SERIOUSLY SRSLY?"

"_YES_, YOU BONEHEADS!"

"HOLY SHIZZNITPICKLEONASTICK!" Malfoy shouted, "GET THIS MARY-SUE OFF OF ME!"

"but darling i luv u wont u stay wit me," said the Mary-Sue.

"NO!" Malfoy said, "BECAUSE I R 1337!"

"SHUN THE NON-BELIEVER!" Malfoy and co. said, holding a hand up to the Mary-Sue, "SHUNNNNN!"

And the Mary-Sue was thrown back, as if she had been hit by a powerful energy ball. She was covered in bruises and her hair was singed. You want to hear about her _clothes_?! As if they couldn't get any more revealing…

"THE POWER OF SHUNNING!" Malfoy said, putting his hand in the middle, "I AM MALFOY!"

"I AM RUKIA!" She also put her hand in the middle.

"BO-BOBO!"

"WINRY!"

"VADER!"

"RAINE!"

"KAKASHI!"

Suddenly, a blue light glowed from their hands and it went up. It looked like an upside-down water droplet. It went –ASPLODE–. Then, a tall, blonde-haired man with blue eyes floated in the air in its place.

Wearing full-body spandex.

GREEN full-body spandex.

Like Rock Lee.

"By your powers combined, I am," He did a loopdy-loop, "FAI D. FLORITE!"

"And Mokona!" said a white bun on his shoulder.

"This isn't as funny as the last chapter," Vader commented.

"Don't you worry!" Fai said, "The sugar-highness/slap-happiness will come LATER! AFTER FINALS!"

"WE HAVE FINALS?!" Winry and Malfoy shouted

"WE'RE TEACHERS!" Raine argued, pointing to herself and Kakashi, who was reading his famous (infamous?) pink book, "We shouldn't have to take finals! WE _GIVE_ THEM!"

"And I'm the Sith Lord DARTH VADER! SITH LORDS DON'T TAKE FINALS!"

"I took them Last week with Ichigo," Rukia said.

Bo-bobo remained quiet.

"No, I meant the Author!" Fai said, still smiling, "She has finals next week!"

"But… they're just semester finals, aren't they?" Winry asked, still trying to calm down.

"Yes, but she still needs to pass!" Fai said, "OR ELSE SHE WILL BE EMOOOOOO!"

"NOOOOOO!" everyone shouted.

That was the last thing they needed - an emo author!

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_

Yes, yes I know… this one wasn't as funny or long… If you have any ideas (again), I would be happy to use them and I'll mention you.

If I have no idea how to insert them, I'll mention you anyway.

And then probably find a way to put 'em in later.

And I know no one's commented on the previous chapter, yet… but I had to get the "SHUNNN!" down before I forgot it. xDD.

It came to me at 3:00 this morning.

Oh, and I'm going to start doing interviews with random characters, so if you have questions for 'em, say so in the comments.


	3. I am NEENJAR!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything mentioned in previous disclaimers, pokémon, the rainbow rocks that melt into rainbow goo and rainbow nachos, ask a ninja, emphasizing the wrong words or… anything else that is owned by someone else.

Okay! First note of importance:

I would appreciate it if you would review… and/or give me ideas – I **_WILL_** MENTION YOU!

Next note of importance:

Your questions can be for ANY character that I know from ANY anime that I know! HUZZAH! Meaning it doesn't have to be limited to characters or anime mentioned in this story!

**Chapter three: I am NEENJAR!**

"Say, Kakashi… what did you say you were?" Raine asked suddenly one morning as they were walking down some road that had no significance to the story but it's there for my (the author's) convenience.

"A neenjar," Kakashi said, squatting like a ninja.

"I AM NINJA, HE IS NINJA, SHE IS NINJA, TOO!" Malfoy shouted.

"YOU ARE NOT NINJA!" Kakashi said, "To be that, you must break open a rock shaped like ASH KETCHUM! AFTER THAT, IT MUST MELT INTO A PILE OF RAINBOW NACHOS! If it melts into rainbow goo, YOU ARE NOT FIT TO BE NINJA!"

"GET ME A ROCK SHAPED LIKE ASH KETCHUM, YOU FOOL!" Malfoy yelled.

"NO!"

"YES!"

"I DON'T WANT TO!"

"YES, YOU DO!"

"SHUT UP BOTH OF YOU!" Raine said, whacking them with her staff, "OR YOU SHALL FACE THE WRATH OF…"

Wait for it!

"ME!" Raine finished.

Silence…

"Miss Raine, you have horrible grammar," Kakashi said.

"BWAHAHAHA!" Said a voice.

Everyone whirled around to see…

A BALD GUY!

"HAIR HUNT TROOPS!" Bo-bobo said, "I've heard of you!"

"Of course you have!" the guy said. Let's call him Francis!

Francis slashed at the text.

"MY NAME IS MAURICE!"

"Wasn't there a guy in the Bo-bobo series already named Maurice?" Winry asked

Rukia shrugged.

Raine just shook her head.

"Your name shall be FRANCIS!" shouted the clouds, causing lightning to strike Francis, thus frying him, "Oops… CAN WE GET A BACK UP, HERE?"

And they waited.

While they were waiting for the waiting to be finished, Kakashi and Vader played go-fish.

"GOT any nines?" Vader asked

"No – and you're emphasizing the wrong words," Kakashi said

"WELL sorry," Vader said.

Meanwhile, Malfoy was writing in a book of some sort.

_**Entry # 581**_

_**Author: Draco Malfoy**_

_**Location: some hill waiting for a back-up Francis.**_

_**Date: unknown**_

_**It's been some time, hasn't it, old buddy?**_

_**Well, I got sucked into a portal a few weeks ago and now I'm trying to save the world with these boneheads. **_

_**From Mary-Sues and Gary-Stus. **_

**_It's quite annoying, really. Mary-Sues make you talk in chat speak, which kind of gets old after a while. _**

_**In order to be completely removed from the spell, you or someone else has to say "I R 1337!" or something… **_

**_Raine cooked dinner last night – it knocked us out. Literally. What was she trying to do? Poison us? For whatever reason, I woke up with shaving-cream all over my face. She must have put something in the food to make shaving-cream monsters want to cover peoples' faces with shaving-cream while they're sleeping. _**

_**Oh well.**_

_**I got attacked by a wall the other day, too. We were helping clean some guy's house and it jumped out at me…**_

_**Oh, Francis is back – gotta go.**_

_**Draco**_

Malfoy shut his book and put it in a secret pocket inside his robes.

"I am NEENJAR!" Said the back-up Francis.

"LIAR!" Kakashi said

"SHUN THE LIAR!" Bo-bobo shouted

"SHUNNN!" Everyone cried, throwing their hands in the air.

No, they didn't detatch their arms. That would be unpleasant.

So, anyway, then, Mokona came out and ate Francis.

"YAY!" Everyone sang in joy.

"Mokona is hungry!" Mokona said, landing on Kakashi's head.

"I thought MOKONA WAS Mokona!" Vader said.

"VADER! STOP EMPHASIZING THE WRONG WORDS!" Rukia shouted

"I can't help IT!" Vader said sadly.

"HUDDLE!" Winry shouted. Kakashi, Raine, Malfoy, Rukia, Winry and Mokona huddled.

"What are we going to do?" Rukia asked

"We could always ignore it," Raine said.

"But, that would get annoying," Kakashi said.

Malfoy nodded.

"Winry? Suggestions?" Raine asked

Winry shrugged as Mokona began chewing on an apple.

"I vote for ignoring," Kakashi said

"YOU'RE THE ONE THAT SAID IT WOULD GET ANNOYING!" Rukia shouted

"Changed my mind!" Kakashi said

"WHY?"

"Because I am NEENJAR!" Kakashi said with shifty eyes.

"I am—!" Malfoy started

"NO!" shouted everyone

"…Hungry…?" Malfoy finished

"TEAM BREAK!" Winry shouted.

They all looked at Vader.

"We have decided to ignore it!" Bo-bobo said.

"ReaLLY?" Vader said, his voice squeaking at the 'LLY' part.

Rukia's eye twitched in annoyance.

"Yes," she hissed.

Then, a pikachu came out of some random bush.

And everyone was like, -staaaare-

And the Pikachu was like, "HO' SHIT!"

And everyone was like, "FOOD!"

And then the Pikachu pulled a fast one and did slow-motion back flips like a neenjar and poofed in a cloud of orange smoke.

"Well, damn," Raine said.

"Let's go find a village or something," Kakashi suggested.

"Why?" Raine asked

"Because I feel like it and I'm always right,"

"What if you're wrong?"

"Then read the sentence over again,"

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_

Is Kakashi really always right?

Am I doing a bad job?

Do I need more whacked-up dreams or my friends to give me inspiration?

WILL YOU REVIEW? Find out next time on… SAVE THE WORLD, PLEASE!

Oh, and Maybe I'll do guest appearances.

If you want me to, you have to state what you want to do AND your gender!

One per chapter


	4. I can't cook, but I can bake!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything stated in previous disclaimers (including any songs being sung), Yakitate! Japan, Lord of the Rings, Peacemaker Kurogane, or Trigun.

Special appearances: **Kuri-Kara** (she kind of helped me with this chapter, too…xDD)

**Chapter four: I can't cook, but I can bake!**

Whilst our favorite group was fighting off some random Gary-Stus, a guy with blonde hair that stuck up, wearing glasses and a nifty trench coat, walked out of some random bush.

"GIVE. VASH. DOUGHNUTS," he said, "VASH. HUNGRY."

"Uh…" Raine said, "I'LL MAKE THEM!"

She was dogpiled.

"RUN, VASH! RUN WHILE YOU STILL CAN GET AWAY FROM RAINE'S COOKING!" Kakashi shouted

"I CAN'T COOK, BUT I CAN BAKE!!"

"Is there a difference?!" Vader asked

"Yes!" Raine said

"How?!"

"You COOK stuff that's NOT DRY and requires a STOVE!" Raine said, "However, when you BAKE, you use an OVEN!"

"You use an oven to prepare chicken, too…"

"I'm not preparing chicken, now, am I? We're making DOUGHNUTS!"

"I bet you don't even USE an oven to prepare doughnuts… because those are pastries…" Said the clouds, "Let's ask our sponsors! KAZUMAAAAA!"

A TV popped out of nowhere and everyone sat down in theatre seats.

"When this is over, I must study this…" Raine muttered to herself.

"Kazuma!" The clouds said, "Do you use an oven to make Doughnuts?"

The boy with brown hair and reddish eyes, Kazuma, wearing a blue-ish baking uniform shrugged.

"I only make Japan!" he said.

"Well, that was useless!" Bo-bobo said, grinning and destroying the TV.

Raine gasped.

"I WAS GOING TO STUDY THAT!"

"Sorry,"

"It's okay,"

"Really?"

"No, but let's pretend it is,"

"OKAY!"

So, the Professor and the Mighty Hero shook hands.

Suddenly, everyone was in baking uniforms and Vash was holding the microphone.

"Why do I get the feeling that we need to do this to advance the plot?" said a familiar voice at the judges' Panel

"So we can find out if Raine can actually bake," said another.

"ITACHI!" Kakashi shouted, surprised.

"Genis…?" Raine asked no-one in particular.

"BWAHAHA! FOOLISH BIG BROTHER!" Said another voice, "I HAVE COME TO TAKE YOUR POSITION AWAY FROM YOU!"

"Sasuke, you bastard, I worked hard for this spot." Itachi said.

Vash stared at the judges' panel and then looked at his imaginary watch.

"Tatsunosuke should have been here by now…" He said out loud, "Legolas, too…"

"Maybe we should call them…?" Vader asked, raising a hand. His uniform was pink – BRIGHT pink.

It had started out white.

"When did you do that?!" Vash asked, pointing at the uniform.

"Just a few seconds ago – I made it so it would fit my personality," Vader said.

And they all looked at him.

"That's actually a brilliant idea," Malfoy said.

"WHAT DO YOU MEAN 'ACTUALLY'?!" Vader shouted

Malfoy was about to say something when a marshmallow was shot into his mouth.

Then, Kuri-Kara came outta nowheres and SHOT MORE MARSHMALLOWS AT MALFOY WITH HER MARSHMALLOW GUN!

While said marshmallows encircled said boy, Kuri-Kara tackled Kakashi.

And then took his mask.

Fortunately for Kakashi, he had another one under it.

Kuri-Kara just ran like hell with the one she'd abducted.

Why? Because she's my AIM friend and shall therefore receive an article of Kakashi's clothing.

Once my hand stops itching.

The characters waited around for the author's hand to stop itching.

While doing that, Tatsunosuke and Legolas came to the judges' panel to sit next to the three already there.

"I keep telling you – if you don't get out and _do_ something, your little brother will never learn to read!" Legolas said.

"He reads just fine,"

Legolas snorted.

"Riiiiight…"

Tatsu raised an eyebrow.

"What's with you?" he asked

"Nothing," Legolas replied.

Silence…

"WE'RE HERE!" Legolas suddenly shouted.

"AS IF WE DIDN'T KNOW!" Winry shouted, chucking a wrench at him.

Legolas ducked and it hit Sasuke in the head.

"WHY MUST YOU ALWAYS HIT _ME_?!" He shouted.

"Because you're emo and abuse the caps lock!"

"That's Malfoy!"

"You're still emo!"

"That's Harry!"

"No!"

"Yes!"

"No!"

"YOU'RE ANNOYING!" Raine shouted at Sasuke, "SHUN THE ANNOYING ONE!"

"SHUNNNN!" Everyone shouted and Fai flew out of the portal with a body bag.

"I'M NOT EVEN DEAD, YET!" Sasuke screamed as Fai bagged him. He forced him into the portal and bid everyone adieu.

"I bid thee adieu!" he said, disappearing.

"That was… odd…" Legolas said.

Itachi had been sitting there the whole time listening to his iTachi.

"OUTSIDE INSIDE OUT! LIVIN' LA VIDA LOCA!" He shouted, "Everybody now!"

"SHE WILL WEAR YOU OUT! LIVIN' LA VIDA LOCA!" Malfoy screeched

Everyone was like, -staaaaare-

And Malfoy was like, "What? He told us to join him!"

"You thought I was serious…?" Itachi said.

"Nevermind…"

So, everyone forgot that incident.

ALMOST everyone…

Kakashi laughed evilly.

"Stupid girl, going through that door…" He said, reading his book.

Okay, nevermind…

Vash looked at his watch again.

"Oh, well. We're out of time for the baking competition," He said.

"WHAT? DAMN!" Raine shouted, shaking Genis violently.

"Wha-a-at d-i-id I-I d-o-o-o?!" Genis said.

"NOTHING!" Raine said, dropping him.

Violently.

Okay, so she threw him down…

But, you weren't supposed to know that.

You just HAD to keep on pushing it, didn't you?

PSH.

I shunneth thee!

But, you can keep reading if you want.

Except that this chapter ends right here.

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_

I NEED REVIEWS…

PLEEEEAAAASSSSEEEE!

Vader: Has it ever occurred to you that they might not like your story?

Foxtail: Yes, that's why I want the people who actually like it to REVIEW.

Vader: … that's what I MEAN.

Foxtail: SHUT UP. –WHACK–


	5. Olives! In my pants!

Kageriluv: **THANK YOU FOR BEING MY FIRST – COUNT IT, PEOPLE! – REVIEWER! **

Kuri-Kara: **THANK YOU FOR BEING MY SECOND REVIEWER! I'm happy you liked your guest appearance. xD**

**This doesn't mean I won't be expecting reviews from the rest of you. :D**

Disclaimer: I do not own anything from the previous disclaimers, South Park or Olive Garden.

**Chapter Five: Olives. In my pants. **

So, they had finally reached the village that Kakashi had suggested they go to – it was called "OLIVE GARDEN."

Genis looked around.

"Where are the olives?" he asked

"WHY ARE YOU GUYS STILL HERE?!" Vader cried.

"Uh… because the Author didn't tell us to go away, yet?" Tatsunosuke answered.

"LEGOLAS! CAREFUL WHERE YOU POINT THAT THING!" Itachi shouted.

"What?" Legolas asked, accidentally letting go and stabbing a random villager, "oops…"

"At least he wasn't vital to the plot," Genis muttered.

"WHAT plot?" Winry asked

"Good point…"

"GUYS! GUYS, GUESS WHAT?!" Malfoy shouted, running over.

"What?" Vader asked

"I'VE GOT OLIVES!" Malfoy shouted, "IN MY PANTS!" He turned out his pockets and Olives fell out, "Well, they were…"

"I hate olives," another random villager said.

"HOW CAN YOU HATE OLIVES?!" Raine shouted, "YOU LIVE IN OLIVE GARDEN! OLIVE HATER!" she started pelting onions at him, "FACE THE WRATH OF THESE ONIONS! ONION POWAAAAH!"

"Uh… Raine…" Genis said

"DON'T INTERFERE, GENIS!" Raine cried, "I'VE GOT THIS UNDER CONTROL!"

"ANY MORE AND YOU'LL KILL HIM!" Genis shouted

"What?" Raine asked, throwing one last onion.

"OH MY GOD!" Some guy shouted, "YOU KILLED KENNY!"

"YOU—" Someone else was about to say.

Raine threatened with handfulls of onions.

"DON'T. YOU. DARE." Raine said, the word "DOOM" in the background.

"Yes, Miss!" the guy said, scampering off.

"Poor Kenny…" Genis said,

"Let's HAVE a funeral!" Vader suggested.

"Here we go with emphasizing the wrong words again…" Kakashi muttered, slapping his forehead.

"I'M sorry," Vader said.

"HOW DID YOU HEAR ME?!" Kakashi asked

"I have goOD EArs," Vader replied

"Uh… okay,"

"WINRY!" Shouted Raine.

"What?" Winry asked

"YOU HAVE A QUESTION FROM KURI-KARA!"

"Isn't she that one girl that stole Kakashi's mask…?"

"Yes," Raine said

"Oh… What's her question?"

"She wants to know if you'll ever marry Edward,"

"…" Said Winry, "NO, WHAT ARE YOU?! INSANE?"

"That probably means yes…" Raine said,

"WHAT?! THAT CANNOT BE!" Shouted a voice.

"Kabuto?!" Kakashi shouted, "I'LL CAPTURE YOU!" Kabuto came running out of nowhere and Kakashi sat on him, "WHERE IS OROCHIMARU'S HIDEOUT?! I DEMAND INFORMATION!"

Kabuto simply stood up and pushed Kakashi off.

"WINRY, HOW COULD YOU THINK OF MARRYING EDWARD?!" Kabuto shouted.

"But… I didn't…" Winry said simply, shrugging.

"SHE SAID YOU DID!" Kabuto shouted, pointing accusingly at Raine, who was constructing an onion gun.

"What? Why are we all looking at me?" Raine asked.

"KABUTO. THE ANSWER IS NO. SO, GO BACK HOME! YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE IN THIS FIC IN THE FIRST PLACE!" The clouds said.

"Well, I guess if an author says so…" Kabuto said. He then shook his fist at the clouds, "IF YOU MAKE THEM MARRY, I SHALL COME BACK TO HAUNT YOU!"

"Only if I write it, you will!" Said the clouds.

Kabuto stomped off angrily.

"Well, that was odd…" Winry said, "But the answer, Kuri-Kara, is no because the author's writing is very biased."

"WOOHOO!" Kabuto shouted from somewhere in the distance.

"I TOLD YOU TO GO HOME!" The clouds shouted.

"PARTY POOPER!"

"DON'T YOU HAVE CHORES TO DO?!"

"SHIT!"

And that was the last of Kabuto.

"AHAHA!" Raine shouted, "IT'S FINISHED!" she cackled madly, holding up her onion gun.

"Raine," Kakashi said, "Put it down."

"Oh, but—"

"Relaaaaaax, there are no Olive Haters around at the moment,"

"I HATE OLIVES!" someone shouted.

"YOU SHALL DIE AN ONIONY DEATH!" Raine shouted, running off.

"Well, that went smoothly…" Malfoy said sarcastically.

In a few seconds, Raine came back all smiley.

"So, you're not gonna lug that thing around with you, are you?" Vader asked

"Of course not!" Raine said.

"Then, what are you going to do with it?" Vader asked.

"YOU carry it,"

"WHY?!"

"RELAX, BOZO! I WAS KIDDING! _GOD_, I-I MEAN, _MARTEL_!"

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_

Was Raine really kidding?

What's with that onion obsession?

ACK! FAX MACHINE!

REVIEW.

AND LEAVE QUESTIONS FOR CHARACTERS.


	6. Survival stories!

Kuri-Kara:** Thank you for your many ideas! I'll be sure to use them! Somehow…**

**Some of these are jokes from the RisemboolRangers Chatroom. :D**

Disclaimer: I don't own anything stated in previous disclaimers, air fresheners or the RisemboolRangers.

**Chapter six: Survival stories!**

So, where did we leave off?

Ah, yes – the onion gun.

Turns out Raine had to leave it behind, since the hotel wouldn't allow anything that would kill anyone inside, save Kakashi's shuriken/Kunai, Raine's staff, Legolas's bow-and-arrow, Genis's Kendama, Winry's wrench, Itachi's… well, Itachi himself, Malfoy's Wand, Rukia's techniques, Bo-bobo's nose-hair, and Darth Vader's choking… thing.

Suddenly, Raine turned to look at Genis, Tatsunosuke and Legolas.

Holding onions.

"LEAVE. WE DON'T NEED YOU HERE,"

"Why does he get to stay?!" Legolas asked, pointing at Itachi.

"Don't question Raine," Genis muttered

"BECAUSE HE CAN!" Raine shouted. She would have thrown the onions had Kakashi not held her back.

That insane woman…

So, Legolas, Genis and Tatsunosuke poofed.

"WELL, THEN. LET'S CHECK INTO THE HOTEL!" Vader shouted, "Since it's two-per-room, let's draw names from a hat to see whom shares with whom!"

Everyone stared at him.

"No, we're not using my helmet," he said, gripping the sides of said helmet.

"Then, what're we going to use?" Itachi asked.

"I KNOW!" Bo-bobo shouted, standing up.

His 'fro opened to reveal…

A BASKET!

"Not just ANY basket – a WOVEN basket!" Bo-bobo said, placing papers with all of their names on them in the basket. He swished it around.

"Would you do the honors?" He asked, holding the basket out to Itachi.

Itachi cleared his throat and was about to speak when the author cut him off.

"Alright, alright. Since this part is boring, I'll just tell you," said the clouds, "First is Malfoy and Vader, then it's Winry and Rukia, Itachi and Bo-bobo, Raine and Kakashi. No, I did not purposely put Kakashi and Raine in the same room – I seriously pulled names from a hat."

Itachi shrugged. He could live with that.

"WHAT?!" Malfoy asked, "I CAN'T SHARE A ROOM WITH VADER!"

"THE FIRST NIGHT: MALFOY'S SURVIVAL STORY!" Kakashi said.

Then, a text box appeared and said, "**_Kakashi has earned the title 'Outbursts are FUN!'_**"

Rukia poked the text box with a stick until it went away.

Malfoy sighed and trudged off to his room to write in the diary—

"JOURNAL!"

Right, right… Journal.

**_Entry # 582_**

_**Author: Draco Malfoy**_

_**Location: Town named 'Olive Garden'**_

**_Date: two days after I last wrote_**

_**OMGZ. THIS SUCKS. I have to share a HOTEL ROOM with DARTH VADER. I swear, that Author TOTALLY DID NOT PULL NAMES FROM A HAT! She probably put it this way cause it would be FUNNY.**_

_**I don't think it's funny at all!**_

_**PSH.**_

_**Draco**_

He closed the book, satisfied, and put it back into his robes.

That night was an odd night.

For everyone.

"I SUGGEST… STRIP POKER!" some unnamed guest they'd met in the restaurant said. Let's name him S.U.G.T.M.I.T.R. – his initials!

"NO," Shouted everyone.

"Fine," Said Sugtmitr, stomping off, "THIS WON'T BE THE LAST YOU SEE OF ME!"

"Losar," Malfoy said, turning his head to the side to do a smiley.

Everyone stared.

"What?" Malfoy asked, turning his head right-side-up again.

"Nothing," Winry said quickly, going back to her food.

Someone then threw crackers at Rukia, who swung at them with her fist.

"TAKE THAT, FOOLS," Rukia shouted

"WHEN CRACKERS ATTACK: RUKIA'S SURVIVAL STORY!" Kakashi said.

"I'm still hungry," Itachi said.

"HUNGER: ITACHI'S SURVIVAL STORY!"

"I'm surrounded by idiots…" Raine muttered.

"IDIOTS: RAINE'S SUR—"

"SHUT UP!"

"Yes, Ma'am,"

They all went back to eating.

"GUYS," Winry suddenly said, "One time, I was downstairs… and… like, my arm…"

"GOT EATED?!" Malfoy asked

"NO! IT GOT STUCK IN THE MICROWAVE!" Winry replied

"MICROWAVES: WINRY'S—" Kakashi started

"NO!" Raine shouted.

"Sorry…"

"I HAVE YOU BEAT!" Itachi said, pointing, "My grandma once Hitch-hiked a bus of penguins!"

"Don't you mean Hijacked?" Rukia asked

"NO, SHUT UP!" Itachi shouted, "Anyway, so she Hitch-hiked it, and dropped a bowl of acid on RONALD MCDONALD!"

"Isn't he that creepy pedophilic clown from McDonalds?" Raine asked

Itachi nodded.

"BOWL OF ACID: RO—"

"NO!"

"Sorry…"

I don't even have to WRITE who said what.

"Hey… you know Davy Jones?" Rukia asked

"The one with the locker?" Bo-bobo asked

"Yeah," Rukia said.

"10,000 LEAGUES BENEATH THE SEA: THE UNTOLD STORY!" Kakashi said, "HAH! YOU DIDN'T CUT ME OFF!"

Raine head/desked.

"Why would anyone want to keep their gym-gear that far under water? Did he not have the money to wash his clothes?" Rukia asked

"Maybe he liked the smell of salt?" Malfoy suggested.

"No, it's because if something stinks bad enough, if you inhale it directly, you could die," Raine said

"And… how do you inhale it indirectly?" Rukia asked

"Through an AIR CLEANSER!" Bo-bobo said, his 'fro opening up to reveal a 'plug-it-in' thing-a-ma-bob.

And then it closed.

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_

What is the real reason that Davy Jones kept his gym stuff 10,000 leagues beneath the sea?

What are these untold stories?

Will there be more?

REVIEW – AND THE OTHER STUFF I USUALLY REQUEST.


	7. Of Food and Inanimate Objects!

**I'm baaaaack**

**I know. You're all like 'WTF NO. DIE, IDIOT, DIE."**

**I only assume this because only Kuri-Kara is reviewing. **

**Thank you, Kuri-Kara. :D**

**So, anyway, you others should review.**

**Or else face the wrath of Raine's onions.**

Disclaimer: I don't own anything mentioned in previous chapters, Biurets, Aloe Vera, InuYasha, Azumanga Daioh, Shoe of Moses, DBZ in a Nutshell (you'll understand that I sorta did a spoof off of it once you get to it… if you've heard DBZ in a Nutshell. xDD), Corky's Pest Control, the games 'Go Fish' and DDR, One Piece, Route 66, Get Your Kicks on Route 66, True Naruto Style (another spoof), the Macarena, Peeps, Marsh of Marshmallows, Chrno Crusade, Prince of Tennis, Teen People, Shonen Jump, Shoujo Beat, Outdoor Living or Lands End (Landsend…?)

**Chapter seven: Of Food and Inanimate Objects!**

So, the plug-it-in, right?

Yeah.

But, that's no longer important, since they decided to go sleep.

Right then and there.

So, anyway, they then left the village and headed off in a random direction.

"OW," Malfoy suddenly shouted, holding his arm.

"What?" Raine asked, looking at his arm, "Wow, that's a lot of dead skin cells – YOU GOT BIURETS ON YOUR ARM, DIDN'T YOU?! WASH IT, BASTARD!"

She kicked him to the river and threw a soap bottle at him, hitting him in the head.

_**Raine has earned the title 'Child Abuser!'**_

"ABUSE: MALFOY'S SURVIVAL–!" Kakashi shouted.

"NO!" Everyone interrupted.

"Sorry…"

Malfoy came back, arm washed.

"PUT SOME ALOE VERA ON IT!" Raine said, "Anyone got any?"

"You're a healer – shouldn't you have some?" Winry asked

"That's for me,"

"Ah… that makes sense…"

All of a sudden, Bo-bobo's 'fro opened up to another Bo-bobo. That Bo-bobo's 'fro opened to another and another and yet another until, finally, Kageriluv and Kuri-Kara popped out.

"WHERE'S INUYASHA?!" Kageriluv asked

"He's not IN this fic!" Rukia replied

"Oh…" Kageriluv said and ran off shouting, "INUYASHA! GET YOUR BUTT OVER HERE!"

Kuri-Kara, meanwhile, jumped on Kakashi.

"YOU AGAIN!" Cried said victim. Kuri-Kara stole his forehead band and ran off.

"Why… does she keep coming back?" Vader asked

Kakashi shrugged and got out another forehead band, putting it on.

"What about my arm?!" Malfoy asked

"Oh…" Raine said, "FIRST AID!" And his arm was healed.

"WHY DIDN'T YOU DO THAT EARLIER?!" Malfoy asked

"Dunno," Raine replied.

Suddenly, a cat came out and everyone was like, '-stare-'

And the cat was like, '-meow-'

… Well, what else would it do? Yeah, a cat's really gonna shout 'G37 4W4Y, F00LZ!'

"GET AWAY, FOOLZ!" The cat hissed.

See? It didn't use halfway-1337:D

"A cat," Itachi stated the obvious.

"KITTEH!" Malfoy shouted, attempting to pet it.

BUT, THE CAT BITZOR HIM!

"Ooh, just like Azumanga Daioh!" Winry said, eating popcorn.

Vader went to help Malfoy take the cat off his hand, but Malfoy was waving the cat around mindlessly, succeeding in 'placing' it on Vader's helmet.

The cat let go, sticking to the helmet.

Raine got out her Onion Gun and shot at the cat.

"I THOUGHT YOU GOT RID OF THAT THING!" Kakashi shouted.

"AHAHAHAHAHA!"

_**Raine has earned the title 'Animal Abuser!'**_

"Wow," Rukia said, "Two titles in one chapter."

The cat hissed and ran off.

And then a demon cow came and attacked Bo-bobo!

Well…

Attempted to, anyway.

"BAH." Shouted the cow as he ran at Bo-bobo, "THIS IS PAYBACK FOR THAT ATTACK!"

Yes, ladies and gentlemen – it IS, indeed, Pedro from the first chapter!

"Payback?" Bo-bobo asked, scratching his cheek.

"YOU DON'T REMEMBER?!"

"NO!" Bo-bobo shouted, flinging potted plants at poor Pedro.

"OH, YEAH?!" Pedro cried, getting out a talisman, "THE ENEMY OF FEET EVERYWHERE! I SUMMON THEE! COME! SHOE OF MOSES!"

And a shoe flew out of the sky.

It was blue.

It had wings.

It had Velcro.

"THE SHOE OF MOSES?!" Itachi asked, dodging said footwear monster.

"TAKE THIS!" Raine shouted, waving her staff around wildly, "ONION JUICE!"

And the shoe was sprayed with onion juice from some unknown place, but it was actually a fire hose.

The shoe was now very angry and caused a storm!

"OH NO! IT'S RAINING MATH PROBLEMS!" Vader shouted.

"ALGEBRA, TO BE EXACT!" Malfoy added.

"UMBRELLA!" Raine shouted and a large, transparent umbrella covered them all as the math problems bounced off.

"NO!" Cried Pedro and the shoe.

"THOUSAND YEARS OF PAIN!" Kakashi yelled, throwing rocks at the shoe.

"SHUN THE SHOE!" Itachi suggested. He and the others put their hands up to the shoe.

"SHUNNNNNNN!" They shouted. Fai came out and sprayed the shoe with bugspray.

"Call 1-800-901-1102! CORKY'S!" Fai sang as he took the shoe to wherever he and Mokona go to wait for when they're needed.

"God any fours?" Sasuke asked

"Go fish! Go fish!" Mokona said

"Darn…"

"Mary-suee! Got any sixes?"

"Lik heer," said the Mary-sue, handing them to the odd creature.

"Yay! Yay! Mokona has another match!" Mokona said.

Meanwhile, our favorite group was arranged in a circle.

"We should go," Malfoy said.

"YA-YO-YA-YO! DREAMIN'! DON'T GIVE IT UP, LUFFY!" Vader shouted before being whacked by Winry's wrench.

"Let's go," Kakashi said, standing up.

A sign popped down and said, 'To advance the plot – take Route 66. To not advance the plot – don't take Route 66,"

"GET YOUR KICKS ON ROUTE 66!" Vader shouted.

So, with that, they took Route 66.

"We're… not in America, though," Malfoy said.

"NOBODY ASKED YOU!" Raine shouted, kicking him.

"I WAS MAKING A POINT!"

"HEY! DON'T IGNORE ME!" Pedro interrupted, but was drop-kicked by Rukia.

"LET'S GO!" Rukia cried, "GO! GO! GO! MOVE IT! MOVE IT! COME ON, GIRLSCOUTS! LET'S GO! HUP-TWO! HUP-TWO!"

and they ran as if they were in the army.

Rukia was like a drill sergeant.

They jumped over walls, ran through tire hoops, crawled on the ground until…

"What the hell are you guys doing?" Asked an overly large Carrot.

"Getting away from Pedro the Demon Cow," Winry said simply.

"FIRST, YOU MUST PASS A TEST!" Carrot shouted.

Walls dropped all around them and desks fell down.

Like… from the sky.

"OW!" Malfoy said, being stupid enough to stand under one of the said raining desks that were falling directly towards where he was standing.

"SORRY!" Shouted a seagull.

"WHAT'S THE TEST?!" Raine shouted eagerly, banging her pencil and fist on the desk.

"I want you to draw…" Carrot said, "A DRAGON!"

"A DRAGON?!" Rukia and Vader shouted.

"YOU'RE UNDER ARREST!" yelled someone. Two brussel sprouts came in and and-cuffed Carrot.

"NO!" Carrot cried.

"YES!" The brussel sprouts sang. Suddenly, everything disappeared and Kakashi did the Macarena.

"HEY, MACARENA!" Shouted the speakers of which Itachi was the DJ.

"HEY-HEY-HEY-HE-HE-HEY, MACARENA!"

"LET'S GO, BITCHEZ," Raine shouted.

AND THEN SOME GUY CAM EOUT OF NOWHERE AND GLOMPED RAINE!

"OFF, BASTARDO!" Raine shouted, her onion gun at the ready.

"But u r rely hawt," Said the (obvious) Gary-Stu.

"Therefore, you should be burnt to a crisp!" Raine shouted, attempting to shoot him with onions.

Kakashi got to him first, though, with his mighty THOUSAND YEARS OF BEING PELTED BY ERASERS!

So, he was pelted by erasers.

And more erasers.

And more.

And—

"GET ON WITH THE PLOT ALREADY!" Everyone shouted.

I'M SORRY I HAVE WRITERS BLOCK. GAWD.

So, anyway, they shunned the Gary-Stu, who joined Fai and Co.

"I'm back," Francis said, holding groceries.

"FOOD," Sasuke cried, pouncing on him and grabbing the Peeps, "MINE!" and he clawed at anyone who tried to take them.

"Hi im gary-stu," Said the Gary-Stu continuously pelted by erasers, "hoo r u"

"Mokona is Mokona!" Mokona said.

"Shoe of Moses,"

"Fai!"

"Francis,"

"mary-sue,"

They all looked at Sasuke, who was munching on his food.

"What?" he asked, "NO, YOU CAN'T HAVE ANY!"

"Gary, here, wants to know your name," Francis replied.

"Sasuke,"

So, anyway, after 'Go fish' was over, the group played DDR.

Back to Raine and her group!

"ONWARD!" Vader shouted, pointing in a random direction and following it.

"Um… Vader," Winry said, "There's a–"

"AHH!" Vader cried, falling.

"–ditch…" Winry finished

So, after Vader recovered, he pointed in another random direction and followed it.

"THAT'S THE WAY WE CAME!"

"RIGHT! I KNEW THAT!" Vader said, pointing in another random direction.

"There's a mote there with–" Kakashi started.

"OUCH!"

"–crocodiles…"

Again with the pointing.

"And there's a cliff there!"

"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! THAT'S AN ONION PATCH! DON'T SMASH THE ONIONS, YOU ONION-SMASHER!"

You can probably guess who said that.

"That's a marsh, idiot. Full of Marshmallows,"

_**Vader has earned the title 'Directionally Challenged!'**_

"We go this way!" Bo-bobo said.

"WHO DIED AND MADE YOU CAPTAIN?!" Vader shouted.

"You," Malfoy answered, "several times."

And he began to choke.

"…" Itachi said.

Winry yelled, "VADER, STOP FORCE-CHOKING HIM!"

Vader whined, "NOT ME!" as Malfoy breathed correctly again.

"Sorry, air went down the wrong pipe," Malfoy said.

Everyone facefell.

"CHOKING: MALFOY'S SUR–"

"NO!" Raine shouted, throwing an onion at him.

So, they continued down Route 66 in the direction Bo-bobo had mentioned.

But, meanwhile, they didn't know that a very… evil persion was watching them…

"AHAHAHAHA!!" Laughed the crazy man that was watching them through the magical fishbowl.

"Yes, your Highness?" said a midget.

"Look, I've found them, midget," said Crazy-man.

Crazy-man's real name was Aion.

Yes, the very same from Chrno Crusade.

You know your manga! YAY!

Ahem…

"Fiore, get me dinner," Aion said.

"Yes, sir,"

"And tell Inui about that crack pairing I came up with. You know the guy – from Prince of Tennis,"

"Yes, sir,"

"What are you still doing here?"

"Renewing your subscriptions to Teen People, Shonen Jump, Shoujo Beat, Outdoor Living, and Landsend,"

"Oh, thanks. What's the next thing on your list?"

"Make your dinner,"

"Okay, hurry,"

"Yes, sir,"

Suddenly, Malfoy sneezed.

"HE'S CONTAGIOUS!" Winry cried, forcing everyone into germ suits as she pleaded with Raine to heal Malfoy.

_**Winry has earned the title 'No germs for me:D'**_

"WHEW!" sighed said worry wart.

Itachi pointed and shouted, "HEY, AREN'T YOU THAT CHICK THAT'S CROSSED-OVER WITH KABUTO?!"

"Yes," Winry replied.

"'Kay, then," Itachi said simply as they continued their walking.

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_

What did Itachi mean?

Why does Raine still have her onion gun?

WHY THE HELL IS AION HERE?!

The answer?

Because I made it so.

Any more questions for characters? Huh? Huh?

REVIEW. :D


	8. Team Onion!

**Man, what's it take to get some reviews around here?!**

**All of my other, crappier stories have got a lot of 'em.**

**Even from people I don't know!**

**So, save an author, leave a message**

**Sasuke: … Big and Rich…? **

Yes, now shut up, bizznitch. I hate you.

**Sasuke: the feeling is mutual.**

**Good. It better be.**

Disclaimer: I do not own things mentioned in previous disclaimers, "LOGGED!", "No one can defeat the power of emo!", Naruto: The Abridged Series or Final Fantasy. LOTR was mentioned in a previous disclaimer.

**Chapter eight: Team onion! **

So, while our favorite group was traveling route 66, a certain… um… person was watching them through the glass of some random restaurant.

"Omigawd, guys!" Malfoy said, "We need a team name! How about Malfoy!"

"Kakashi!" Kakashi said.

"NO, I VOTE RUKIA!" Rukia cried

"BO-BOBO!"

"ITACHIIIII!"

"WINRY, IDIOTS!"

"VADOR!"

"But, your name is spelled 'Vader'…" Rukia said.

"I know that,"

"TEAM ONION!" Raine shouted darkly.

"TEAM ONION IT IS!" Kakashi agreed.

_**Raine has earned the title 'Onion Mistress!'**_

And suddenly, they were all wearing shirts with onions on them, somewhat like jerseys for a soccer team.

So, they all decided that they were in need of refueling and went into the next restaurant.

Which happened to have the one that the random person was in.

"AHAHAHA!" Cried said random person.

"OH MY GAWD, SASUKE!" Itachi yelled, pointing a finger at him.

"NO! YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO RECOGNIZE ME!" Sasuke cried, jumping at him and attempting to hit him. However, Itachi turned into a log!

"LOOOOOGGGEEEEDDDD!" shouted the log

"NO! IT'S YOU AGAIN!" Sasuke shouted, "I shall defeat you this time!"

and they went into a battle sequence, kind of like Tales of Symphonia.

I know. That was stolen from Naruto: The Abridged Series by MasakoX and Vegeta3986.

But, what can I say?

I want their skillz.

So, anyway, the battle sequence.

Sasuke got into a fighting stance and the Log kinda stood there.

**_Log casts 'Judgement!'_**

"GUARDIAN!" Sasuke yelled, a green ball encircling him.

Unfortunately, since this is Sasuke, the spell got through the…other spell, thus causing Sasuke to get a K.O.

Once the battle sequence ended, though, Malfoy stupidly stabbed him with a Phoenix Down. Sasuke ran at Kakashi with shuriken.

"NO ONE CAN DEFEAT THE POWER OF EMO!"

Kakashi sighed.

"Not another take-off of Naruto: The Abridged Series… Stupid Fan-Copyright infringement…" he muttered as he sat on Sasuke.

"No… No, you know what? I hate you. I hate all of you," Sasuke said. Kakashi stood up and Sasuke sulked away.

_**Author has earned the title 'OMGSKILLZPLZ'**_

No, that doesn't mean I have skillz.

It means I want MasakoX and Vegeta3986's skillz.

Like shazziggety loofa.

"Shazziggety loofa?" Rukia asked no one in particular.

Yeah, just roll with it.

"I like Rolls," Raine said, "AND ONIONS!"

"Yes, yes, WE KNOW," everyone shouted.

So, they ate food without finishing that argument. Just as they were about to leave, someone stood in their path.

"YOU SHALL NOT PISS!" said some guy.

"IT'S GANDALF!" Winry yelled.

"YOU SHALL NOT PISS!" Gandalf repeated.

"But I really gotta go!" Malfoy whined.

"Rock paper scissors, best three of five," Gandalf said.

Malfoy nodded and they began.

Malfoy had Rock and Gandalf had Scissors.

_**Malfoy: 0. Gandalf: 1**_

"What?!" Malfoy cried, "Rock beats scissors!"

"NO, THEY DON'T!" Gandalf shouted.

Next, Malfoy had Scissors and Gandalf had rock.

_**Malfoy: 0. Gandalf: 2.**_

"WHAT?! BUT—!" Malfoy cried. He sighed. "FINE."

And now, Malfoy had Paper and Gandalf had Scissors.

_**Malfoy: 1. Gandalf: 2.**_

Pretty soon, Malfoy somehow won.

Said boy ran off insanely.

And everyone waited.

And waited.

And waited some more.

"Hey guys," Winry said.

They all looked at her.

"Let's leave him," she continued.

They all nodded in agreement and then left the place.

"Oh mah gawd," Vader said, "This is crazy, but I think Malfoy's actually part of the bad side!"

"Come to think of it, he IS acting emo…" Rukia said.

They all nodded.

"He shall be shunned!" Raine concluded.

They nodded again.

Malfoy ran around the corner.

"Are you on the bad side?!" Winry shouted.

"YES!" Malfoy yelled.

They all put their hands up.

"SHUNNNNNN!" They all cried and Mokona popped out and ate him.

MEANWHILE…

"I thought I told you not to tell them you were on the bad side!" Aion yelled.

"Well, I was being sarcastic when I said 'yes'," Malfoy said.

"How many times do I have to tell you that you FAIL at sarcasm?!"

Malfoy shrugged.

"IT WAS A RHETORICAL QUESTION!"

"Sorry…"

"Idiot…"

MEANWHILE AGAIN…

"I can't believe that," Winry said.

"I know," Bo-bobo said, "I didn't think he was on the bad side either."

"No, I was talking about how that sign over there says 'BELIEVE IT!' on it," Winry replied.

Bo-bobo looked at the said sign, got a spray-pain can out and wrote 'DON'T' before it.

Raine nodded in approval.

And they went merrily on their way.

_**TO BE CONTINUED…**_

**Guys, seriously. **

**Please review.**

**I really want to know how I'm doing.**

**It's been the same people time and time again.**

**Well, this time we had someone new…**

**Thank you, Darra!**

**AS FOR THE REST OF YOU GUYS, REVIEW, DAMMIT! **

**REVIEW! **

**REVIEW YOUR ASSES OFF!**


	9. Filler! Not really!

**A filler?!**

**NO!**

**Guys, come on. It's so EASY to review. All you have to do is click the little button and type something!**

**HELL, I'LL EVEN ACCEPT "AHAHAHA."**

**OR "HAHA"**

**OR "HA."**

**OR MAYBE EVEN AN ADVERTISEMENT!**

**Just come on, guys! Please? PLEASE? I'm beggin' ya, here.**

**How come all of my crappy stories get reviews and yet the one with proper grammar, spelling, punctuation and mostly capitalization doesn't? I review all the time if the fanfic is funny.**

**So, just please. If I've read one of your fanfics and commented at least once, at least comment ONCE on mine.**

**ONCE.**


	10. Chapter 10 which is really 9!

**I LIIIIIIIIIIIVE!**

**I know, I know. **

**Yer all like…**

"**Goddamn it, Riku!" (yes, Kingdom Hearts Riku)**

**Riku: How is this MY fault?!**

**Everything is your fault, Riku.**

**Riku: Why?! **

Because you're emo and I hate you.

Riku: I'm not emo, I'm in a boy band!

… Okay, that's just creepy. 

**But anyway…I got reviews I got reviews dances Thank yoooou**

**TalaLakota, TheFirstHokage, Ptoras and Katana01 **

**Much lobve and happiness goes out to you**

…

**Lavi, Tsura, do the disclaimer**

**Katsura: Not Tsura, it's Katsura!**

**Lavi: What? Why us? Oo  
**

**Because you're my current obsessions. Now do it or I rape you both.**

**Lavi: Fine, fine. Foxtail/CK/Cody the Ninja does not own anything mentioned in previous chapters.**

**Katsura: Neither does she own D.Gray-Man, Avenue Q or Gintama.**

**Chapter 10: Chapter 10 which is really 9!**

So… Bo-bobo sprayed the sign last, right?

I don't even know where they are anymore…

Oh, right… Route 66…

But I'm not a freshman anymore, so let's pretend they got all the way to… wherever it goes. I can't remember. But not California. They started there, remember? No? Oh, right… I didn't mention that…

"Wow, while the author was gone, we advanced a long way!" Winry said.

"WINRY, YOU HAVE ANOTHER QUESTION" the clouds sang out.

"Oh, um… great?" Winry replied

"Your question is from Katana01…Why wouldn't you marry Ed when he loves you?" The clouds asked.

"Like I said in chapter four, because the author is very biased. She also lives off of crossover pairings," Winry said simply.

"I'M NOT WEARING UNDERWEAR TODAY! NO, I'M NOT WEARING UNDERWEAR TODAAAAY!" Vader sang, "NOT that you probably care, MUCH about my underwear, STILL nonetheless I gotta SAAAAAAAAAAAAYYY That I'm not wearing underwear tooo-daaaaay!"

"GET A JOB!" Some woman who is not his drunk-therapist-fiancée shouted.

"THANK YOU…"

"Stupid," Raine said, making a face and throwing an onion at him, "Anyway, we need to hire a jack-of-all trades."

"What? Why?" Itachi asked.

"We just do, okay?" Raine replied, "So that foxtail can get her fill of Gintama in this fic, stupid."

Kakashi nodded.

"TO EDO!"

"What?" a voice asked as a NOT SHORT person appeared.

"Not you, Ed," Winry said.

"Oh, okay…" Edward replied, leaving the screen.

So, they started their trek to Edo. Of course, since I don't intend they appear JUST YET… I will be explaining their trip in this chapter.

"KAKASHI I LUV YEW," Some girl said.

But, before Kakashi could respond—

"AKUMAAAAAAAAA!" a boy WHO DID NOT LOOK LIKE AN OLD MAN BECAUSE OF HIS HAIR screamed insanely. He came running at said girl and his arm transformed into something I'm not good at describing. The girl transformed – half way, it seemed – before the boy killed it.

"Jeeze, Allen, calm down," Said a boy with red hair.

"OMIGAWDLAVI," The clouds screamed.

"HEY," Lavi shouted, pointing at the clouds, "I DID PART OF THE DISCLAIMER WITH TSURA, SO NO RAPING EITHER OF US."

"I know that! God!"

"NOT TSURA! IT'S KATSURA!"

"NOBODY CARES!" Raine shouted, throwing an onion at him. But Katsura being Katsura, he dodged and disappeared.

Probably to go get rid of the Shinsengumi again…

"I suggest—No, never mind, I forgot," Rukia started.

"Rukiaaaa you, too, have a question from Katana01" The clouds said.

"So, I assume that this is just a question-corner episode with a lot of interferences?" Bo-bobo asked.

"Sure, whatever," The clouds replied, "RUKIA! Who do you "Like" back where you come from?"

"Ichigo," Rukia nodded thoughtfully, "Definitely Ichigo,"

"Don't tell me it's because the Author is biased, again…" Itachi sighed.

"Yes. Yes, it is," The clouds replied.

"Can we GO, now?" Winry asked

"What the crap?! Is the chapter ending already?!" Kakashi shouted.

"Yes, because I have to do homework," The clouds replied.

_**TO BE CONTINUED… **_

**Katana01, your other questions will be answered in the next chapter**

**I'm so happy I got reviiiewwwws!**

**Lavi: She's so happy, it's kind of creepy… She's usually all tired…and stuff. Oo**

**Shut up, Lavi.**

**Lavi: I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME!**

**I do, I do…**


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